Step 4: How to be understandingGuys don not really read profiles. Sure, we skim them over a couple times and look for points to talk about, but we don't usually read between the lines. We do not really look for the depth of her words; the subtext of what she is really saying... what she is really asking for. What am I talking about? Let's go right to an example.
Here's a section of a woman’s dating personals in site:"I've been here before, perhaps too many times, each time a little more jaded. If only we could be more honest with each other, the world would be a better place. I'm looking for a guy who is kind, faithful, and sincere."
Is she saying she is looking for a kind, faithful, sincere guy?Only on the surface. What she is really telling us is....
"I've been hurt by men."
How did I get that out of the above paragraph? Re-read what she's saying: she's come back time after time, even more jaded, which means she's gone through numerous free dating relationships, each of them having ended badly. She's wishing for more honesty, which means she's faced a lot of deceit. And she's looking for a guy who is kind, faithful and sincere, which heavily suggests that she knows what she wants because she's done time with a lot of guys who have been unkind, unfaithful, and insincere to her.
So, I see this profile and I see a girl who has been hurt, and I know that she will respond to a guy who is kind, faithful and sincere? So is that how I present myself?
*NO!*
I'm going to do even better. There's a guy that she'll respond to way more readily than the above guy... a guy who UNDERSTANDS HER! Forget everything about what women say they want on the surface! Deep down... they want to be understood (we all do really). Being a guy who understands who she really is and sympathizes with her is much more powerful and rare.
To address that, I would write something like:"I read your profile and couldn't help but feel a twinge of sadness at your words. We all seek happiness in life, but disappointment certainly seems to find its way in often enough. Like you, I simply seek a bright sunny day in a cloudy world."
I don't confront her issues directly of course, a subtle brush is all it takes to get her attention and let her know that the potential is there. This would certainly get her attention away from the guys who write "I'm sincere, honest, and faithful." You know... the same guys that hurt her in the past?
Enjoy your free dating relationship
Step 5: Wrap it upSo you've grabbed her attention with humor, then you let her know that you are an intelligent, insightful guy that is really paying attention to her. You've got her attention. Now you just need to wrap it up and drive her towards your profile. There are lots of great ways to wrap up your email to her. A simple and effective one is to create a positive image of the two of you together, and command her reply.
For example:"Picture this... You and I walking in the park, playing catch or just kicking around with a couple of ice creams on a sunny Saturday... If that's the way you love to spend a lazy weekend, we'll get along famously. My email is at the bottom, you know what to do!"
Now simply wrap those three things together... in your own words of course... and start emailing girls. And wait one more critical thing... Always include your picture! Having a great photo is a different article, but it's something you absolutely must do.
What... you thought it would be as simple as writing "Hey baby, what's up?"
Cheers and happy dating!
AdultXDating